I'm sitting under the great hulking frame of the eiffel tower, in the dapled shadows of a steaming afternoon. It's so hot that I keep moving from shadow to shadow while the sun strips the landscape bare and turns his bright eyes under and over the seine, letting steam roll out from the hard bitchimen paving.

The lady in front of me in yellow leggings and red, blue and yellow top looks like a melting all day sucker. A bare footed gypsy girl, her long hair and skirt trailing behind saunters from one tourist to the next asking do you speak english. Everyone is wize to this old trick today, and she is turned away from every lounging group of tourists including me. Women stroll around like large tropical birds fallen from the tree tops in coca colada dresses, all the dark from winter fallen away. They sashay and saunter through the park while men's eyes follow their dainty movements. Is it not mating season for human's and animals alike?

I am entertaining the thought of seeing my lover tomorrow morning, like he suggested, but think it's better to let the pot simmer a little more to intensify the heat. I think of his soft voice. That big frame containing a boy, with the most acute sensitivity. Although I am openly sensitive I still feel like a rough unpolished stone next to his fragile sensibility.

Back In Paris

I wake up under the crook of your arm, and touch your skin, warm and slippery, to make sure it's you. That we are really back in each other's arm's and not separated by 22,000 kilometres of ocean.

I leave your body warm under our nest of covers, and race out into the cold winters morning to see if this is really the same old Paris I used to know. Used to love and hate by turns.

The cold stings my hands and face. I open my painted red lips to suck in the air and take a bite of Paris. TODAY I WANT TO EAT PARIS. A lone rider zooms past me in a tangle of scarfs and coats. He squints into the cold rush of air and scowls into the soft blue light of day break.

Buildings recede into the fog and tiny bridges curve over into the streets. Seeking refuge from the cold I step into a book shop. The shop assistant steps on my toe as she hurries past me to go about her morning chores. She spits out a stream of dialogue. Something about not being ready to open, but I can stay. I ignore her and her attitude and buy a book.

Paris is buzzing with music from my Ipod, and I run all the way home and dive into the arms of my lover. He yawns like a cat as he pulls me back under the covers. He wats me to kiss the tip of his cock while he brings himself to orgasm. He watches my ruby red lips linger, breathing in his scent before swallowing him whole. I indulge him with my kisses before leaving again.

It's now afternoon, AND I WANT TO SEE MORE, I WANT TASTE MORE, I WANT FEEL MORE of this city. I don't hate it today.I'm sucking the marrow from it. Oblivious to the past. To memories. Yes they're still all there, but today is not about that. Today is about me and my lover.

THE WANKER

Walking through the mouth
Of the metro I was
Listening to Bjork sing
All is full of love
When I noticed a guy jerking off
Against a wall
He turned around
To show me his
Erect penis protruding through
The zipper of his army style pants
FUCK YOU ARSHOLE
I yelled over Bjork's lyrical beauty
He stuck his finger up at me Nervously jabbing it through the air
I stuck mine back at him
AS I began to cut
Through the
thickening afternoon crowds
My heels thumping the pavement
As I ran to catch another
Over crowded Metro

I TRIED TO PRETEND

I tried to pretend

that everything was alright

That the past never happened

That I never saw your ugly core

But In the end I couldn't pretend

The festering wounds

lying just beneith the skin, the heart

I tried to pretend

That you never broke me

So I could feel the warmth of your caress

Look into your eyes and be swallowed

with a dream

I lied to myself to recieve your love

But I should have known

That there is no love

When the faith is dead

IF ONLY WE COULD MEET IN THE DARK

If only we could meet in the dark without words

Where my mind is frightened

My body feels no Shame

These old feelings have no place to go

but back inside of each other

THE STARS

" Don't the stars make you feel small" He said as he looked down cast through long curving lashes. There was a star in my eye. A universe in my heart. That little kitchen in Clovelly became the whole world, the rest receeded away to a mere pin. I wrapped a pair of long black stockinged legs around his seated body.

"Airies women never ask for permission." His statement only succeeded in making me feel bolder. A more expansive version of myself. I wanted to suddenly be more generous, to divolge secrets that had been locked. His presence was in one word freeing.

We fell into bed as one solid, writhing mass. The stars flew in my eyes, the ocean which hummed outside rolled waves inside my cheast when he kissed me. I felt him so hard inside me. Joined like forged metal. Tongues, hands, breasts, pulsating. Slippery.

His sadness touched me. I wanted to make it go away, but even I have spent enough time amoungst these planets to know that only time heals all.
Perhaps when I see him again when winter has melted into spring, he will be shining like a star.